How Crystal Works
Emotionally Focused Therapy for Couples
Emotionally focused therapy, or EFT, sees conflict between partners as a sign of a deeper need: to feel close, safe and important to each other.
How Crystal Works
EFT in Plain Language
Many couples get caught in a cycle. One partner pushes for closeness and comes across as critical. The other pulls back to avoid a fight and comes across as cold. Each reaction makes the other stronger. EFT helps you see the cycle as the problem, rather than each other, and talk about the feelings underneath it, like fear of losing each other or not being enough.
When partners can say those softer things and be heard, the relationship often starts to feel safer.
Signs EFT Might Fit
- You keep having the same fight about different topics
- One of you pursues and the other withdraws
- You feel lonely inside the relationship
- You want to rebuild trust after a hurt
- You care about each other and feel stuck
What Sessions Can Look Like
Early sessions map out your cycle. Later sessions slow down key moments so each person can say what they actually feel and need. The work is collaborative, and Crystal keeps a steady hand when conversations get heated.
How Crystal Uses EFT
EFT is among the approaches in Crystal's training, and couples and family sessions may draw from it alongside the Gottman method. Crystal does not apply one method to everyone. Sessions may draw from this approach when it fits your goals, alongside others in her training.
The Three Broad Stages
- Understanding the cycle that pulls you apart
- Reaching the softer feelings and needs underneath it
- Building new ways of turning toward each other, and making them last
Beyond Romantic Couples
The idea behind EFT, that people need to feel safe and important to the ones they love, also applies in families. Parents and teens, adult siblings and blended families can get caught in the same cycle of pursuing and pulling away. Family sessions may draw from these ideas to help each person say what sits underneath the conflict. Couple and family sessions are $250 after a $300 intake.
What You Might Notice Over Time
As couples work through EFT, the goal is for hard conversations to feel less dangerous. Partners can often name the cycle out loud when it starts, reach for each other instead of away, and repair more quickly after a rough moment. Every couple moves at its own pace, and the work is shaped around your relationship, not a script.
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